unfinished insurance business

Mika woke up and realized he's dead. The Grim Reaper then showed up looking purple and bloated, scratch that, in a form of a purple balloon. Having enjoyed Life in Cartoon Motion, GR (Grim's nickname) thought that the least he could do is to make Mika's journey to the other side a bearable experience. Secretly though, he was a fan. And the reason behind the singer's death is for him to enjoy Mika's falsetto- live. GR loves live music. Ever wonder why Jim Morrison, Joey Ramone and the likes died? Now you know. He tied himself to Mika and flew him up in the air.

Up above the atmosphere Mika felt good. Floating felt just like sex minus the sweat or marijuana. He couldn't distinguish. And he didn't care. But just when he thought death felt so damn good, he remembered his life insurance. It wasn't fully paid. He wasn't satisfied with the services offered by his current insurance company. He wanted to get a new one but it was already late. He was halfway there. But the whole thought made him feel uneasy. He didn't want to die without a life insurance that promises to Reduce Premiums , makes him Save Money on Insurance and offers Cheap Smoker Insurance Rates . He didn't want to die unless he gets an insurance.

Suddenly, the whole floating experience got excruciatingly painful like some post-op without his morphine. He told GR he couldn't continue because of some unfinished business. It pained GR but he couldn't let his new-fangled singer down. He didn't want to be selfish. He knew how it felt. He didn't have insurance either. And so he gave in. He gave Mika's life back but made him promise to call him whenever he felt like dying. Mika Agreed.

The next morning, Mika woke up with a new idea for his My Happy Ending video.

Motivate me

Two years ago, never did it occur to me that my motivations for taking up nursing would falter. Last time I checked, it was all sturdy. But lately, you would come up to me, express your oohs and ahhs because I chose to take up such a noble profession. I then savored your admiration for a second, smiled back at you and said the uttered the words, “If you only knew” at the back of my head. Secretly, I harbored dreams of green bucks, earning, saving, spending and earning them again to finance my education- by which I mean creative writing and photography, probably change my citizenship and join Survivor, try my luck in Hollywood. Or maybe do porn. My parents would have been so not proud.

But those motivations are clearly blasted off like some misplaced Buddhas in Afghanistan, having been failed at pharmacology, taking it up again this semester and, you stepping into every shoes of all the people I'm being introduced to, saying your oohs and ahhs every time I said that I'm taking up nursing. But, no. Those admirations don't help like it used to. You are no longer helping. Yes, I liked the admiration. But I don't care about what you think. And stop smiling.

This is hard to say, but I'm not sure If I want to be where I am right now. Some kids would take my slot in a heartbeat any minute I opt out. The problem is, it's too damn late. If everything pans out right, I could be graduating really soon. My parents would then be proud of me. And I will no linger be eaten up by guilt knowing that all this time my folks think highly of me and have already spent a lot.

Until I can build some kind of a better structure for my motivation, like helping the sick and the needy without doing colossal damages on my pursue of material comfort or when I finally get over your admiration, I'm good to go. But for now, I need to study. And tomorrow, I'll deal with my issues.

fill in the blank

I wish I were a multiple choice question. At least I'd have an answer. Because next year, I'll be celebrating my 2nd decade of existence on earth and I still don't know what I really want. This thought just keeps on building up like a pile of crap and all i do is bottle it up.
I'm thinking of doing Crystal Meth to find that solace and answer I'm looking for but I know I shouldn't unless I ant to unleash the mentally ill person in me.
I'm taking up nursing all for the wrong reasons. Sometimes, I think of committing suicide but I couldn't break my parents' heart. They've already invested a lot on me. I should have done it years ago when I didn't owe them that much.
I'd do anything to be dj or be on Globe Trekker... a tour guide or just simply write or just bum around.
I flunked pharmacology because of my plain stupidity. I took for granted stuffs I should have given attention to because I thought I was gonna get laid. Heck, I didn't even get a kiss. Lately, I think I'm falling and it sucks! No matter how I try to keep the door shut, love has a habit of coming back.
I wish I'd be given answers to choose from. But no, all I got is a blank and I have no idea on what to put on that void. I don't know. I just don't know.